He Speaks about Mad Cows, is for Change,
Against Illegal Aliens, A Washington Outsider,
Who is Against the War,
and Refuses to Save the Whales.
ALAN D. JONES IS GOOD FOR AMERICA!
I’m Alan D Jones and I approved this message
I’M FOR CHANGE: I will stand for change. I will also sit for change. I like nickels, dimes, quarters… all change. I think that I like Morgan silver dollars the best though.
If you like change too I suggest you go to a bank and ask for some from your paper money. Banks usually have lots of change. You can also get change at places like the supermarket and the Laundromat but in there you usually only can get mostly quarters.
I’M AGAINST ILLEGAL ALIENS:
Our country is being over run and this needs to stop. These creatures make crop circles and abduct small town folk… little green men from Mars or what ever planet they come from need to be stopped. I’ve seen movies like “Alien”, “Independence Day” and “Mars Attacks”, and nothing good comes from them.
At minimum America needs to try to set up some line of peaceful communication with them like they did in “Close Encounters of the Third Kind”
DON’T SAVE THE WHALES!
This is downright silly. If you save them, where are you going to put them? Their huge. Leave them in the oceans. Just trust me on this one. If you need to collect something for a hobby, collect something more manageable like stamps or base ball cards.
PEOPLE ASK ME ABOUT MY RECORD:
I don’t own any records, not a single L.P. I admit to once owning them and some eight track tapes… but now I have a few cassettes and C.D.’s and I mostly listen to MP3’s…
our future is not in the vinyl past.
WHAT I THINK ABOUT THE WAR:
I don’t understand the war with a rock. What did the rock do to us? I do know that people in glass houses shouldn’t throw rocks, but that’s a non-issue because the residents of glass houses tend to be plants and I don’t think they have any issues with rocks… Plants like soil right? Isn’t that just really tiny rocks? I have no issue with any rocks, I used to own a pet rock.
WHAT TO DO ABOUT MAD COWS:
We should send in some human services people and ask the cows why they are so mad. Maybe they are angry that they are being given growth hormones. Some guys taking steroids can become aggressive too, it may all just be a misunderstanding.
The cows could be mad that we are taking their corn they like to eat and making ethanol bio-fuels. I’m going to be very upset too if this whole thing ends up where I can’t have any popcorn or tacos. I like tacos. I like them a lot.
A WASHINGTON OUTSIDER:
I’m “outside” of Washington, I have never, ever, been to either the Capital or the State for that matter, I’ve always been outside of Washington..
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